Recently, I watched the movie Governor, wherein the lead actor, Mr. Manoj Bajpayee, plays the RBI Governor, Mr. Raman, who arguably steered the Indian economy through the BoP crisis of 1991. The protagonist displays exemplary grit, resilience and a never-give-up attitude amidst the turbulent and chaotic political landscape of the country during that period. Seeing that grit, I was reminded of my college days—days which, in hindsight, I think I can cherish for having exhibited some resilience and grit, though towards my personal goals.
December 2014 was a testing time for me. I was in the 5th Semester of my college, and we were scheduled to appear for the University Entry Scheme (UES) Interviews of the Indian Army. At the same time, I was among the selected students to represent the University at Mood Indigo, the prestigious annual cultural festival of IIT-Bombay, which was scheduled to be held during the last week of December. We were also to appear for the Major (Term-end) examinations of the semester during the same month.
But, as fate would have it, just a couple of days before the UES Interview, I got infected with Chickenpox, thanks to an outbreak in my hostel block. I was down with high fever, with bruises and blisters all over my face and body. Along with a couple of course-mates, I was admitted to the Medical Aid Centre (MAC) of the University and kept under isolation.
However, I was very much excited about the UES Interview and didn't want to miss the opportunity. The infection was a major personal setback for me, as being a highly contagious viral infection, I was under strict isolation. Nevertheless, I kept pushing for the Interview and made continued requests to my Training and Placement Officer (TPO) in-charge to let me appear for it.
My requests finally bore fruit. The Interview panel agreed to let me appear for the interview during the last-day final session, but with strict social distancing and preventive measures in place.
I still remember that day when I was getting ready for the Interview. My formals were kept in my hostel room, and I requested one of my friends to deliver them to me at the MAC. As my body was already bruised with spots and blisters, I couldn't apply anything on my face to groom myself for the interview. So, wearing formals, without a haircut or a shave, and with a face mask, struggling with fever-induced weakness but full of excitement, I, along with another friend in the same condition, was boarded into the ambulance to the Interview venue.
I remember, instead of the documents and file/folder, I was carrying a notebook with me, just to have the feel of an interview.
As I appeared before the Interview panel comprising Army officers and greeted them, I was asked to keep standing and not use the chair. They asked me a few questions, which I tried to answer, and the interview lasted for just about 4–5 minutes.
But, to my surprise, I found my name in the list of shortlisted candidates for the SSB, scheduled to be held the following month at Allahabad (now Prayagraj). Though I was screened out on the first day, it was still my only attempt towards appearing for an Armed Forces recruitment process.
Later, during the same month, I also missed a couple of examinations until I was discharged from the MAC. The next target was to get those examinations conducted for the subjects I couldn't appear for and, at the same time, not miss the Mood Indigo opportunity. And, I had just 2–3 days for the same.
So, I made a representation in writing to the Vice-Chancellor requesting re-examination for the subjects on medical grounds. However, I was told by some of the staff members at the Administrative Block that it was extremely difficult—read impossible—to get the approval within such a short period, and that I should either give up the plan of going to Mood Indigo or go without appearing for the re-examinations, which would mean a backlog in those subjects.
But instead of giving up on my hopes, I made an earnest plea to the subject teachers, who agreed to conduct a re-examination even on a Saturday/Sunday, provided I had the written approval of the VC for the re-examinations.
The next day, when my representation had reached the VC's desk, I sat outside his office in the morning, seeking a personal hearing. But, being the highest authority of the University, he had many other tasks and scheduled appointments throughout the day and was naturally occupied. The attendant outside his office suggested that I come on the next working day, but I insisted on seeking an appointment that day itself.
I kept waiting throughout the afternoon, much to the annoyance of the attendant, and finally was allowed to meet the VC around 5 in the evening.
I presented my case and made an earnest plea for an early approval for the re-examinations. The VC, though irked by my persistence and pleas, finally gave his approval, albeit after some schooling about procedures and processes. But what mattered to me at that moment was the much-needed approval.
I rushed to my subject teachers with the approval and requested them to conduct the re-examinations the very next day, to which they benevolently agreed.
Hence, I made my way to Mood Indigo at IIT-Bombay.
But, the challenges were not to end there. The next challenge awaited us in Bombay itself.
While we had reached a day early in Bombay, we were to be allocated accommodation inside the campus only from the following night onwards, that too subject to availability. So, we stayed put in a hotel near the IIT campus. We were a group of around 15 students from different streams and disciplines.
But the next morning, we found that the hotel was somehow not appropriate for us to stay and that there might be risks to the safety of the group, especially the girls. Further, there were natural budget constraints in getting another hotel for the entire group.
So, it became an emergency-like situation for us to arrange accommodation inside the IIT campus at the earliest. We were desperately trying our contacts to arrange accommodation inside the campus, which was already almost fully occupied due to the huge rush of participants from all over the country.
Adding to the chaos and tension, I received a call regarding a family emergency back home.
My grandmother, who had not been keeping well for the past few days, had passed away.
Alas! That was a huge personal loss for me, as I was emotionally very close to her.
I talked to my father and desperately searched for a flight to Jammu to ensure that I reached home to attend the final rites of my grandmother. But I couldn't find a viable option. The earliest available flight was the next morning, and that too at exorbitant prices, which was beyond my budget.
I could have overcome the budget constraints with the help of my fellow team members, but that too wouldn't guarantee that I would reach home in time. So, my father consoled me and suggested that rather than returning home, I should stay in Bombay and attend to my official duties.
After some thought, and left with bleak chances of making it home in time, I decided to stay there only.
I was under intense emotional crisis and stress. But now, I decided to make efforts to get accommodation in IIT-Bombay. I made desperate efforts while sitting at the seashore at Marine Drive. I vividly remember those moments. It was Christmas Eve. The seashore was occupied with people celebrating. There were also the group members and my friends, who were consoling me at one moment and worrying about accommodation the very next moment.
Almost everyone was clueless, and there was a hue of emotions all around.
After making dozens of phone calls and sending numerous texts, I finally found one contact in IIT-Bombay through a friend. We decided to rush to the campus.
We somehow managed to get accommodation for the girls, but the task was only half done. Another friend helped in arranging the rest of the group's stay in a hostel room, thanks to the gracious gesture of a student on the campus who allowed us to stay in his room until we could get proper accommodation.
Thus, ended a major turmoil.
Those few days, in hindsight, give me a mix of nostalgia, goosebumps and some grief as well. But deep within, I know that it was a significant period for me that tested my grit, patience and emotional maturity.
I think I managed those situations quite responsibly, thanks to the never-lose-hope attitude that kept me going. There were several occasions when giving up would have been the easier option. I could have accepted that the UES Interview was simply not meant to happen. I could have accepted the backlog in my examinations. I could have given up on the Mood Indigo opportunity. I could even have abandoned the effort to arrange accommodation in Bombay amidst all the chaos.
But perhaps, at that point in life, I had somehow learnt an important lesson: when there is something that matters to you, you must at least make an honest attempt before accepting defeat.
Whether I succeeded or failed eventually was a different matter. I was screened out of the SSB on the very first day. The re-examinations were merely an academic requirement. And the loss of my grandmother remains a grief that no achievement can compensate for.
Yet, the experience of having persisted through those difficult days remains with me.
Looking back, I realise that resilience is not always about achieving the goal. Sometimes, it is simply about refusing to give up when circumstances give you enough reasons to do so. It is about making one more phone call, waiting a little longer outside an office, making one more request, or simply trying one more time when everyone around you thinks that it is futile.
Those few days were perhaps one of the defining moments of my life. They changed something in me. They shaped my personality, my patience and, to some extent, the way I look at life.
Life has its own way of testing us. Sometimes the tests come one after another, leaving little time to recover from the previous one. And perhaps, it is during such moments that we discover something about ourselves which we otherwise may never have known.
December 2014 was one such period for me.
It taught me that hope is not merely an emotion; sometimes, it is a decision. A decision to keep trying when giving up seems much easier.
Nicely written
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